If you know deep down that you are meant for something bigger, this message is for you.
The other day I was sent a question from one of my insta-friends, “How do I get the courage to show my work on social media?” and it hit me like a super sized water balloon. I thought to myself “other people struggle with this too?” I mean, these days people share everything down to their coffee on social media every morning, why wouldn’t they share their creative pursuits?
I can completely relate to this. About a year ago I began my podcast, I probably recorded twenty before I ever even published one. I was so hesitant to press that publish button for fear of what others would think. For years, I’ve been successful in my interiors career but when shifting into new territory deeper fears begin to emerge . I have thrown out so many photos of things I haven’t felt were worthy of the ‘gram. As a new mom, I have such a hard time with photos of myself, too. There is so much pressure to have things look perfect, it can absolutely dismantle any and all ideas of successful sharing. It’s natural for all of us to have that sense of insecurity in our work, so we set out to get the feedback and permission from others to allow us to continue and go for it. I’ve learned that the fastest way to feeling stuck in life, is to hide our creative expression. You see those people who bury themselves in shopping problems and happy hours, they often find that they are covering up their creative expressions with these masks. It’s a gift to yourself to let your creativity shine.
I really feel called to touch on this topic because I truly believe that we live in a time where creativity is encouraged and celebrated and the table isn’t full. If you have a passion, a talent and something that you love to do, you were ABSOLUTELY meant to do it and share it with the world. The world is waiting for you to show up and show off your skills. Success is possible for all of us.
Having said that, I absolutely understand what it feels like to not feel confident enough to stick with it and self promote your new venture. It’s like those musicians that never “finish” their album, if you peeked behind the curtain, you would see that they continually are “working” on it so they never have to open it up to the possible rejection and scrutiny. It can be incredibly overwhelming as an artist to show your creative pursuits to the world. This is where personal development is key to building a profitable and flourishing business. We have to be willing to take a look inside of ourselves and see what is really going on in the subconscious mind.
So, how is it that some people out there effortlessly share their work with the world with no hesitation and seemingly have the magic touch that turns everything to gold? CONFIDENCE! That’s how. The thing is, confidence can’t be bought but it can be built, you just have to make a decision and choose to be confident.
A few ways to find your own personal confidence and build it:
STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS. Literally, stop. Years ago my girlfriend, Cara Alwill Leyba told me that she stopped following anyone on social media that was in her industry. She didn’t want what they were doing to influence her work, you should definitely read her book if you need a boost of confidence. I think this is very important for creatives. We are living in a time where we can see pretty much at all times what other people are doing and that can totally distract us from our own focus. The less time you spend checking out & comparing yourself on social media, the more time you have to be creative and innovative on your own.
BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. Here’s the deal, there is no other you. So there is absolutely no possible way that anyone else can actually copy or replace you. They can’t be YOU and you can’t be THEM. So don’t try. Focus on your skills, talents, traits, quirks and build on them. Make a list of each of your unique qualities and post it on your bathroom mirror, make it your screensaver. Do whatever you have to do to remind yourself how unique, qualified and talented you are.
GET ZEN. When you relax, let go and just go with the flow of things you create less drama around sharing your work. If you want to share, share it. If you don’t, don’t fight that feeling. Dropping the drama around “sharing your work” decreases the resistance to it. Then, when you’re ready to, you’ll share. When you have this stress-free attitude, you’ll naturally give off a confident vibe. This is my personal favorite confidence hack.
CHECK YOUR GUT. Ask yourself what it is that you really want to do. Deep down if you are feeling like you need/want/should share your stuff, you should listen. Your intuition knows your potential and when you follow her advice, she gets stronger, louder and will always have your back. Don’t let your fear talk you out of it. Your intuition will speak in a positive tone, your fear will speak in a bossy, harsh, mean girl tone.
FILL YOUR MIND WITH POSITIVE ENCOURAGEMENT. Podcasts, books, YouTube videos and blog posts like this one should be on demand for you. You can always find me in the grocery store, car or getting my nails done with my ipods in my ear. I am always learning and growing. Here are a list of some of my favorite resources when I am feeling a little less confident:
Gary Vee- just one episode of his podcast should pump you up. I also really love his book Crushing It, I highly recommend it.
Jen Sincero- she has two really great books, You are a Bad Ass & You are a Bad Ass and Making Money. Both are great reads.
Gina Devee- she is such an inspiring business woman and will give you that big sister pep talk you’ve been dying for. I absolutely love her talk show videos.
JUST START. Honestly, every time you share something you’ve done with the world, you build the muscle of belief in yourself. The first time I had a jewelry trunk show and stood up in front of a group of women talking about my jewelry I couldn’t speak I was so nervous. Once I got over that hump and began chatting with women who were in love with my work, it shifted. My energy was lighter and free and I felt confident to do it again and again and again.
REMEMBER THIS: When you do begin to share, you will begin to find your people. You are not the only person in the world who will love what you do. There are people out there who will be attracted to you and your work, those are your people. Your people are waiting for you to show up because they are looking for you, they need you to shine so they can shine too.
I love you, Ashlina
p.s. If you have any confidence tips or hacks, let us know in the comments section that way we can save this post for future reference.
p.s.s. If this post resonated with you, you’ll like this one too.
Title image photo credit: Crystal Virgin Mary @killdie Kyle Montgomery art
Blissful Boss Babe: How to stand out in a saturated market
I can remember very clearly, the day I decided that I was ready to start my new jewelry business, Love Ashlina Jewelry. It was such an incredible feeling, it felt like I was falling in love with life all over again. Just like in a fresh romantic relationship, it felt so utterly blissful. When you are in a state of searching for clarity, once it finally begins to come together, the experience can be absolutely invigorating. (Side note: if you are looking for clarity in your life and/or your business, Labradorite is an excellent crystal to work with.)
I’ve been an entrepreneur for over 10 years at this point but as I have transitioned from interior design to jewelry design, I feel like I am starting all over again. It’s like my second life. Luckily, I have plenty of experience in entrepreneurship. However, when I was starting out many moons ago, it was fairly easy for me to thrive because I didn’t have a super saturated market in my field. I was a pioneer of my particular type of business. Now, with my new jewelry business, I am navigating the ups and downs of building something from scratch, while trying to stand out in a market that is already plenty full.
I felt it would be important for me to share some valuable tips and tricks to help you navigate your own business. These tips can be useful for life too. As always, I feel it is important to document and share what I learn, so my blog has been a consistent element that I have found to be invaluable. Not only does it help when you document what you experience, it serves as a great resource for others and a great way to reference things. Hope you find these tips to be helpful.
#1 FIND YOUR WHY:
When you are wanting to start a business or even grow one that you are currently working on, I have learned that one thing in particular has been incredibly essential for staying focused and on track. Determining why you are even doing it in the first place. You have to find your why, something that goes deeper than money, and deeper than just a superficial desire to feed the ego. There has to be a meaningful and soulful reason why you are creating something. I dish more on this in episode No.45 of the Blissfully Ambitious podcast.
Before I began my jewelry business, I had already determined my personal why. It was something I deeply prayed about and worked on after reading this book. When you are called to and driven by a why that goes deeper than you, you will be spiritually more aligned with a flourishing business. When the core meaning behind your business is to ultimately help only you, you are going about it the wrong way. When you determine what it is that you can do in business, that is all about truly serving others for a higher purpose, there’s a grander supply of energy that flows towards that.
Once I finally got clear on my why, the idea for my jewelry designs came to my soul and the whole business fell right into place. I would also like to add that I find myself in a continual state of inspired ideas flowing right to me. I truly believe that it is because I am clear on the why and the purpose behind what I am doing. When the reason is bigger than you, the business grows that way too.
#2 STAY CONSISTENT:
Here’s the deal. Life is busy. It’s hard to work on your business and in your business while living a life. There are absolutely a million things to do between branding, marketing, emails, socials, networking, oh and not to mention the actual business or service you are providing. It can cause you to be effective in one area and not another or go lax on your accounting, etc. It’s important that even if you feel overwhelmed, you are being consistent in the way you do what you do.
No matter what happens in my life or world, I am focused on creating content that provides inspiration and education. Even if I am between ideas, feeling uninspired or just not in the mood, I do something that is creating value for my business and brand. And I do it consistently. The reason for this is that consistency builds trust and that trust will gain you a loyal customer base.
One of my mentorship clients is a personal trainer. She does virtual sessions. Sometimes she is slow in her business and so she takes a break from social media and goes MIA for weeks at a time. Then she comes back and wonders why no one really responds. I remind her that in today’s digital age, we are bombarded with 97234234 messages every hour. Naturally, we can’t keep up with everyone and everything. HOWEVER, If she were to offer an informative piece of content, consistently, her people will find her and crave her.
Picture this: a girl searches for diet tips for pregnant women. She stumbles upon your instagram page, every Tuesday she sees your business/brand offering ideas for recipes for pregnant women, she’s going to come back next Tuesday and look for more. She also will do all she can to find the past 52 Tuesdays for more information on recipes and tips. By the time she is done consuming all that content, she feels you are friends, she knows you, supports you and buys your product! Heck, she even signs up for your newsletters, too. This is how you build your cult following. Stay consistent, show up and keep going. It will pay off in dividends in the long run.
#3 SHARE YOUR TRUTH:
This is a tough one. Let’s face it, we all worry about what others are going to think about what we say, think or do. It’s just part of life. Other peoples opinions can be detrimental to the growth and expansion of our businesses. They say that starting a business is the best personal development course out there. It’s pretty accurate actually. In order to be honest and authentic, you have to work on yourself daily to be able to speak your truth and not be afraid of how that looks.
Let me ask you a question…do you refrain from posting things on social media because of what someone may think? Can you picture a particular person who may be standing in your way of your own authentic success? Most likely, there are a few people so it is very important to become aware of the people/situations that may be holding you back.
Begin to work on declaring truths about yourself. Who you are deep down. Are you a pink haired pixie inside but a blonde girl with extensions on the outside? Are you a vegan leather backpack carrier on the outside but a Chanel toting woman on the inside? Or vice versa? Do you do run on the treadmill 5 days a week but actually prefer to do a barre class but you’re scared to step out of the box? There are many variables to it but take some time to go deeper into who you really are.
For a long time I was in the spiritual closet. Not really sharing the meditating, soul searching, crystals, sage, etc. I would have crystals all over my bathtub and vision boards hidden all over the place. Over time I came around to it and luckily, the self development/spirituality world blew up.
HOT TIP: These little insider secrets that are your truth can actually help (not hinder) your business & its success. The more you come out of your own closet, the more you will inspire others to do so too and they will hire you or buy from you along the way. (The other day I saw a meme that said something to the effect of, I am not interested to check my phone for texts or emails but rather to see who is buying my products from online sales. For me, I could relate because each woman who purchases jewelry from me feels like a soul sister. It is a relationship I am thrilled to pour into because these are my people with little truths like my own)
If you are looking for an easy way to uncover those truths about yourself a little more, I highly suggest my book the Blissful Living Journal. Inside there is 30 days of journal prompts with deep diving questions that really give you the opportunity to get to know yourself more. I wrote the book when I was pregnant, a very transformative, soul searching time for me. It is the exact questions I gave myself when I was needing some more truths.
#4 SHIFT YOUR MINDSET
One of the things that I believe is integral for your small business success is to continually shift your mindset to one of major success. In order to shift yourself out of self-sabotage and into flourishing success, you must build up a mindset that supports you. In Neuro Linguistic Programming, you learn that through repetition and true emotional belief, you can manifest anything you want. You have to believe that you are the best at what you do, believe that you provide absolute value, believe that you are a gift to your customers!
There are several modalities that can help you program your mind for success in your business, I teach this specifically inside my 21-day video course, Soul Aligned Success. You can do this through repeating affirmations and mantras on repeat. Here are a few to get you started:
💕 My business is a huge success
💕 I believe in myself and trust in my abilities to succeed in all that I do
💕 Being successful is natural for me
💕 Success, money and happiness come easily to me
💕 My work makes a difference
💕 I am smart and successful
💕 I can achieve any goals I set myself in business
💕 I create wonderful business opportunities
💕 My income is constantly increasing
I am passionate about teaching women how to launch and grow their businesses, especially online. In today’s world, it is so important that we realize the limitless potential that the online world can give you. In my program, Online Boss, I teach you everything you need to know about building your online business empire.
